Lies Women Believe

 "A career outside the home is more valuable and fulfilling than being a wife and mother."

"Half a century ago, a handful of determined women set out to achieve a philosophical and cultural revolution. Convinced that women needed to throw off the shackles of male oppression, they wrote books, published articles, taught college courses, marched in the streets, lobbied Congress, and in myriad ways; succeeded in capturing the minds and hearts of millions of women.

They redefined what it means to be a woman and tossed out widely held views of a woman's priorities and mission in life. Concepts such as virtue, chastity, discretion, domesticity, submission, and modesty were largely eliminated from our vocabulary, and replaced with choice, divorce, infidelity, and unisex lifestyles. The daughters and granddaughters of that generation have never known any other way of thinking. One of the more devastating objectives and effects of this 'new' view of womanhood has been to demean marriage and motherhood and to move women -both physically and emotionally- out of their homes and into the workforce. Dr. Dorothy Patterson observes: 

Women have been liberated right out of the genuine freedom they enjoyed for centuries to oversee the home, rear the children, and pursue personal creativity: they have been brainwashed to believe that the absence of the titled, payroll occupation enslaves a woman to failure, boredom, and imprisonment within the confines of home'

Whoever expected we would have to live with such things as...

• pressure placed on women by their peers to "do more" than be"just a wife and mother"
• the status of a "homemaker" being devalued to something less than that of a serf:
• millions of infants and toddlers being dropped off at day care centers before daylight and picked up after dark:
• millions of children coming home from school to empty houses or being relegated to after-school child care programs:
• mothers giving their best energy and time to persons other than their husbands and children, leaving those women perpetually exhausted and edgy:
• families that seldom sit down and have a meal together:
• children subsisting on frozen dinners and fast food eaten on the run
• emotional and physical affairs being fanned by married women spending more quality time with men and work than they do with their own husbands
• women gaining enough financial independence to free them to leave their husbands
• women who don't have the time or energy to cultivate a close relationship with their children and who end up permanently estranged from their grown children
• children spending countless hours being entertained by videos, TV, electronic games, and computers
• elderly parents having to be placed in institutions because their daughters and daughter-in-law are working full-time and can't manage their care.
• inadequately supervised children becoming exposed to and lured into pornography, alcohol, drugs, sex and violence

In determining our priorities as Christian women, we must first ask: Why did God make women? What is His purpose and mission for our lives? The Word of God provides women of every generation  and culture with the Truth about our created purpose and primary role and calling. When we embrace the Truth and establish our priorities and schedules around it, we experience true liberation. In Genesis 2:18 we find the first and clearest statement of why God created the woman:

"The LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."

There you have it-God created the woman to be a helper to the man-to complete him, to be suited to his needs. Her life was to center on his, not his on hers. She was made from the man, made for the man, and given as God's gift to the man. Her relationship with her husband was the first and primary sphere in which she was to move and serve. Her husband was responsible to work to provide for their material needs. She was to be his helper and companion in reflection the image of God, taking dominion over the earth, and reproducing a godly seed.

... The woman was uniquely designed and equipped -physiologically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually-by her Creator to be a bearer and nurtured of life. In a multitude of ways, she was endowed with the ability to add life, beauty, richness, fullness, grace, and joy to the family unit. There in no greater measure of her worth or success as a woman than the extent to which she serves as her the heart of her home.

... The Scripture is clear that a married woman's life and ministry are to be centered in her home. This is not to suggest that it is necessarily wrong for a wife and mother to have a job outside her home-unless that job in any way competes with or diminishes her effectiveness in fulfilling her primary calling at home. Further, it is important for women to evaluate their reasons for working outside their home and to identify and deception behind those reasons.

For example, it is widely assumed today that a family simply cannot make it without two incomes. It is true that one of the unfortunate by-products of the feminist revolution is that our economy has become dependent on two-income families. However, that does not necessarily mean that families cannot survive on one income.

The Truth is that God gave to the man the primary responsibility to be the "breadwinner' for his wife and children. The Enemy has seen to it that it has become extremely difficult to function this way, but it is always possible to live according to the Truth if we want to.

... Even many secular women recognize the tension that is created when a woman tires to marry a career with a family. In an interview, actress Katharine Hepburn said:

"I'm not sure any woman can successfully pursue a career and be a mother at the same time. The trouble with women today is that they want everything. but no one can have it all.

Another actress, Joanne Woodward, agrees:

My career has suffered because of the children, and my children have suffered because of my career... I've been torn and haven't been able to function fully in either arena. I don't know of one person who does both successfully, and I know a lot of working mothers."

In contrast... women can choose to be mothers that are 'choosing life every day'...

• with every meal they prepare;
• with every load of dirty clothes they wash
• with every trip they make to the grocery store, to school, to the dentist, to piano lesson, to soccer practice, or to the shoe store
• with every scraped knee they bandage
• with every encouraging word they speak
• with every night hour they spend rocking a sick or scared child
• with every dispute they arbitrate
• with every moment they spend building Legos, coloring,
• helping with math problems, reading a Bible story, or listening to a husband or child describe his day
• with every moment they spend interceding for the spiritual growth and protection of their family.

"Day in and day out, they are building a home: they are being life-givers: they are laying a foundation and building a memorial that will outlive them for generations to come: they are honoring their Creator in the greatest possible way." Demoss (pgs. 124-131)